i wake up in the morning excited about breakfast, and i love to end my days snuggling up to Kyle with a heaping, delicious bowl of ice cream. third-trimester pregnancy and the first month of my newborn baby's life, complete with long nights of wakefulness, simply served as magnificent excuses for more fresco melts and smooth, vanilla milkshakes from the nearby steak and shake.
as i reflect on my long-since-passed high school days, when i was growing like a weed in my walk with God but in dire need of learning how to own my sin (still needing improvement in this one)--i felt stuck in a pit of insecurity, and food tied with bff Lauren Johnson as best friend in high school.
i rejoiced the day i learned from a precious Nav friend how to coupon and shop the deals at publix. that fell on the timeline during a rougher, darker season of my life, riddled with loneliness, new fears, and uncertainties, so large amounts of inexpensive food provided an unexpected means of temporary comfort.
food is a blessing. I Timothy 6:17 talks about God richly providing us with things for our enjoyment.
but am I still thankful for the giver when He removes the gift?
"You have been concerned about this vine, though you did not tend it or make it grow. It sprang up overnight and died overnight." Jonah 4:10
okay. i'm barely into this post, and i'm already being dramatic. i'm not starving. but my precious emaline has been diagnosed with a milk and soy protein intolerance. since she is exclusively breastfed, this means that we either start her on a special formula that is far out of our budget, or else i keep nursing. so i have to drastically alter my diet. no more dairy, nothing including any soy (there goes half my food intake. did you know soy products are literally in almost everything, chewing gum included?), no red meat, and easy on the nuts.
day 1 of new diet:
i can do this. we will find a way to make it work
day 2:
reality starts to kick in. i'm like ray charles going through withdrawals in the movie "ray." i'm grumpy because there are six flavors of BOGO breyers in my freezer, and i am not allowed to touch them.
day 3:
huge pity party. woe is me. nobody in the world has it this hard. nobody understands. kyle, how dare you put milk on your cereal. don't you see that some of us are suffering here?
day 4:
pity parties aren't much fun when breyer's icecream and twix bars are off limits.
day 5, 6, 7, 8:
depression
after this, in the grieving process, i think somewhere down the line you are supposed to reach the "acceptance" phase, so i think i did. i bought rice milk. i ordered a milk and soy protein free mommy cookbook and resigned myself to a lifetime of boring food. i diligently clipped what coups i could and chopped endless veggies. i cooked, and cooked, and cooked.
but yesterday i got a phone call, and all of a sudden the sun came out. birds started singing, and i realized i wasn't craving breyer's anymore. betsy didn't whine with me over the phone about "how hard that must be." her kind voice assured me that this would someday be something i would thank Him for as one of the greatest blessings of my life.
did you know that you can eat soy, dairy, and even gluten and sugar free without ordering diet cookbooks and reading diet food blogs? all you have to do is look around the world. our culture stands alone in its allegiance to a dairy-based diet. they really don't eat much string cheese or velveeta in the middle east. :)
i didn't mention this earlier, but somewhere around college or maybe soon after, my great enchantment with food eventually gave birth to a zealous fervor for cooking. i was smitten. the chopping of fresh herbs, vibrant and alive. the intoxication of sauteeing garlic and onions as you make fresh spaghetti sauce. the exhilarating freshness of tabouleh in summer and the glowing warmth of african stew in winter. and now this precious friend across the phone wire was inviting me to come over and learn from her to achieve the flavors of the middle east, latin america, greece, thailand...
thanking Him today for a better vine.
phở - a delicious, vietnamese noodle soup that you can whip up in your own kitchen without any dairy or gluten
http://www.foodfit.com/recipes/recipe.asp?rid=801
ReplyDeleteWe don't use the coconut milk, and we use EVOO instead of butter. And I don't poach the chicken 'cause it gets rubbery that way. I usually use leftover chicken or put the chicken in the crock pot and just shred it in there with some forks when it's nice and tender. So much easier that way.
You'll do great! And you will get used to it. Before you know it, you won't even remember what it was like to cook with those banned ingredients.
I share your heart for food. I also share your heart for breastfeeding and a healthy baby! Back when my supply dropped, I tried gluten free for a month and it was tough. One of my biggest resources was Renae Sperling. I have her contact info if you need/want it.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.passionatehomemaking.com/recipe-index
this is a great website with lots of yummy recipes that are definitely all soy free! Some may or may not be dairy free but many are easy to alter. How did they pinpoint those two things to be the culprit? Have you gotten second opinions? Praying for you friend!
Thanks for sharing Nicki! I admire you for having the courage and determination to stick with this new diet. Although I was immovable when it came to sticking it out with nursing - I didn't use the same determination when it came to changing my diet. Aryn was colicky and I knew it had to do with my diet, but I was still able to nurse and she gained weight really well... so I just suffered (and made her suffer) through the colic without making much effort to change my diet. But since then, like you, God has been challenging my previously unchallenged approach to eating. More specifically - eating healthier. And having kids definitely adds more motivation. Your blog encourages me to keep at it and continue on the road to eating healthier. Significantly cutting back on dairy is probably the biggest challenge for me, but I continue to see more and more how it has been adversely affecting my health. I wish I had some good recipes to share, but like you I'm just starting in this. Thanks for the ideas in looking at foods from other cultures!
ReplyDeleteI don't know if this post will reveal my name, so it's Katie Olson :)
ReplyDeleteI thoroughly enjoyed reading this and finding out what's going on with you, and I intend to read more after posting this comment :)
Did you know that Lauren Hood just got majorly restricted on her eating, too? That's what's been depleting her energy and giving her migraines. Her list of "not to eat" is enormous - no gluten, dairy, chicken, beef, pork, garlic, soy, corn. . . the only 3 vegetables in the world she can eat are raspberries, mangoes, and 1 more, I can't remember what.
But she has been going over to my Mom's house every Monday and learning how to cook foods she can eat, so I think that's been helping her out. And the daily little blessings--finding a cookie she can eat, finding pasta she can eat, etc.
Also, once you stop breast feeding, you can go back to eating any food you want, right?
Love you! You're such a wonderful Mommy, too, btw!